What does it Mean to Belong?

September 2, 2019

What does it mean to belong? 

Belonging is considered a basic need by Dr. William Glasser psychotherapist and author of Choice Theory.  He posits that all human beings need love and belonging, freedom, fun, and power.  When we don’t get what we need, we often try to fill that void in less than healthy ways.  Glasser also says that we each need a different amount of those fundamental desires.  I happen to need a lot of love and belonging. 

I grew up in a Jewish household and went to a private Hebrew day school until 7th grade. During that time, I felt apart of something, connected, held by my traditions and ancestors. I went to public school, with maybe 3 Jewish families in 7th grade, and had a lot of trouble integrating there. I had friends and participated in activities but never felt that strong feeling of belonging. This lasted into high school and college. I didn't see religion as my tribe- again I had friends and activities, but I didn't actually know where to find that feeling of belonging. After college I joined AmeriCorps and connected with communities through service. I felt something there! A spark - a coming together of varied backgrounds and traditions, a shared goal, something to work towards. Years go by and I buy a house as a single person in a new-to me neighborhood. I need help with house things, I need to reach out. And there I was looking for that community again.

So this theme of tribe and community has come up in my life over and over again. It's something that I am obviously called to figure out and because it’s so real for me, it’s also something I see our society needing more of – more loving friends and neighbors - stronger bonds between people – a collective mindset rather than individual viewpoints.  Don’t get me wrong, I am quite the individual.  I am strong and independent and like to do things on my own.   And while that furthers a feeling of empowerment, it rarely furthers a feeling of belonging. 

So part of my work is to build community and the tool I find most dynamic and transformative is art, specifically collaborative public art. Art is this abstract instrument anyone can participate in. There is no right or wrong way to express.  We can all lend our individual aesthetic to a larger piece. Through art we can realize the metaphor of how community actually works.  Our individuality informs the whole.  Each person’s contribution is important and valid.   

So this website is kind of a social experiment-  to see how the belonging equation shifts when we come together around art.  How do we feel when we engage in communal projects that allow human expression to be the glue in our communities? 

What happens when people who don’t usually work together come together around a simple idea?

Let’s find out.  On this site, I’ll be posting about art and community– how others do it, how I feel when I do it, and my observations about how it affects our world.